No Grounds for Boasting

When it comes to salvation, the joke's on us: we bring nothing to the table.

Genesis 18:1-15

Do you ever notice how quickly God raises the degree of difficulty in the Bible?

Adam, don't eat the fruit of the tree in the garden.

Noah, build me a boat.

Abraham, cut off the tip of your...

"Can I just build you a bigger boat?"

How do you think Sarah reacted when she came home and found Abraham in the shower?

"What? Why did you do that to yourself?"

"God told me."

"Abraham, if God told you to kill your firstborn child, would you do that, too?"

There's not a lot of laughter in the Bible.

There are jokes that we could make about the Bible. Jokes like, Moses came down from Mount Sinai and said to the Israelites:

"Look, guys, I've got good news and I've got bad news. The good news, I got them down to 10 commandments. The bad news, the one about adultery is still there."

Speaking of the seventh commandment, why is divorce so expensive? Anyone? Because it's worth it. My wife came up with that joke.

There's not a lot of laughter in the Bible. Though, there are jokes that we could make about the Bible. Jokes like, Jesus walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Give me a wine glass and fill it with water." Jokes like, How long did Cain hate his brother? As long as he was able. I published a book with the word funny in the title, that's practically a comedy diploma. If I say laugh, you say, how high?

There's plenty of jokes we could make about the Bible.

Jokes like:

Adam said to Eve, "Stand back, we don't know how big this gets."

Jokes like, my favorite.

Jesus came across a woman caught in adultery surrounded by angry priests and Pharisees, so Jesus said:

"Whoever is without sin may cast the first stone."

And one by one the priests and the Pharisees drop their rocks and slink away. But then suddenly a stone comes sailing through the air and strikes the woman upside the head, killing her dead.

And Jesus says:

"Sometimes you really torque me off, mother."

There are not a lot of laughs in the Bible. In fact, by my reckoning, there's just two instances of laughter in all of scripture. The first place is Matthew chapter nine, where Jesus is called to the home of a ruler of the synagogue and it's no laughing matter. The ruler's little girl has just died. Jesus comes to a place of death and the crowds gathered at the man's home, laugh at him.

They laugh at Jesus.

What was the punchline?

The punchline was Jesus' promise, your daughter will live.

Life from death.

Evidently a laughing matter.

Good news in the face of grief, the living God shows up and all of us gathered around death, laugh him off.

The second place for laughter is Sunday’s lectionary passage in Genesis chapter 18.

Her husband entertains God himself unawares while Sarah eavesdrops from the flap of her tent. Her back is bowed, her hair is thinned. Her hands are palsied and liver spotted. She's all gums. She's got just a few teeth, which is fine because all of her appetites are just about gone. She's closing in on 100 years old and eavesdropping.

She overhears God's promise of redemption through a child, her child, and she laughs.

She hears the promise of God as a punchline.

God's redemptive promise sounds to her ridiculous. And why wouldn't it? Why wouldn't it? This was 4,000 years before the invention of Viagra, whereas Mary receives her part of this same promise and replies, let it be with me according to your word.

Sarah laughs like the crowds ready to bury the dead girl.

Sarah laughs not ha ha, but a “yeah right, when Sheol freezes over” a cynical laugh, an understandable laugh, a laugh we would all likely laugh, but a laugh that nonetheless is the opposite of faith.

And before we pile on Sarah, before we pile on Sarah, I should point out Sarah laughs at God's redemptive promise for you through her.

Sarah laughs at God's redemptive promise because she's hearing God's redemptive promise for the first time.

Old Abraham never bothered to tell her.

Go back to Genesis chapter 12, to undo all that we had done at Babel and before God first made this promise to Abraham 25 years earlier. Abraham sat on this promise of God for almost three decades. Sarah's dearly beloved didn't bother to share with her what God had promised for both of them. It's true that her laugh is a cynical laugh, the opposite of faith. But that's because her husband didn't believe the promise enough to pass it on to her. It's funny. These are not impressive people. By the way when God first called him, Abraham left behind his home and his family and his belongings and his country. He left it all behind in order to go to the land that God would show him. Left everything behind, the reason Abraham here has servants whom he can order to grind and mead and bake, the reason Abraham here has not just a calf, but a whole herd of cattle which he can feed his guests with.

The reason he has so much is because back in Egypt, back when his wife was young and beautiful, Abraham passed Sarah off as his sister and pimped her out to the Pharaoh. He lied about her. And then with dollar signs in his eyes, he rented her out for money, which I'm guessing required more than chocolates and roses to reconcile.

The wealth that Abraham lavishes on his mysterious guests in Genesis chapter 18, it was ill-gotten gain, which means God has been eating and drinking with sinners from the very beginning.

And but before you start feeling sorry for Sarah, remember, turn the page on today. And Sarah is the one who will pitch a jealous fit and demand that her husband forsake their servant girl and her baby to the wilderness. And God only knows what else.

What a joke— of all the people in the world the God who knows the secret thoughts of all of our hearts, chose these two for his redemptive purpose. These two lying and pimping and coveting and conniving and unbelieving and ungodly, even. These two people to whom God gives this promise.

They're not even God's people.

They are literally the ungodly.